


Love World of Love

by Khoshekh42



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: (Because DUH), AKA, Based on Love World of Love by Steam Powered Giraffe, Bisexual Todd Brotzman, Dirk smirks a lot, Fluff, Gay Dirk Gently, M/M, Song fic, Steam Powered Giraffe (Band), The Universe Ships It, The Universe is trying to tell things to Dirk, Todd is a self deprecating little shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-05-26 11:25:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,001
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14999909
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Khoshekh42/pseuds/Khoshekh42
Summary: Fluff of Dirk realizing that Todd is just as smitten with him as Dirk himself is with Todd. Featuring- Todd singing cheesy love songs into the whisk, Dirk using his ninja training for very important things like hiding from Todd so that he might hear him singing more, and Dirk’s sneaking suspicion that Todd is singing about someone in specific.Farah is so done with these two.





	Love World of Love

A voice called out from the kitchen, waking Dirk up from his sound sleep. He was marching out to tell Todd off for waking him up, until he realized what it was that Todd’s voice was doing.

“Well his eyes, sparkle like butterflies  
Floating up into the sky, they make me say oh my  
“And his mind has thoughts that really shine  
Right down into mine, he’s oh so very kind”

Dirk peered into the kitchen, and he saw Todd, still in his pajamas, whisking what looked like pancake batter in a bowl.

“Lalala, lalalalalala  
Lalalalalala, lalalalala, la”

Todd was very good at singing, Dirk decided.

“Love world of lo-o-o-o-ove  
Love world of lo-o-o-o-ove  
Love world of lo-o-o-o-ove  
“Lalalalalalalalala  
Lalalalalalalalala”

Dirk’s heart pounded in his chest, as he decided, just for a moment, to allow himself to believe that Todd was singing to him.

“Well his face, never needs a makeup case  
He doesn’t need the help of lace, his beauty makes my heart race  
“And his heart I’ve known it from the start  
With it I never want to part, it truly is a work of art  
“Lalala, lalalalalala  
Lalalalalala, lalalalala, la”

Todd abandoned whisking in favor of singing into the whisk, which started dripping pancake batter onto his hand.

“Love world of lo-o-o-o-ove  
Love world of lo-o-o-o-ove  
Love world of lo-o-o-o-ove  
“Lalalalalalalalala  
Lalalalalalalalala”

Dirk had a hunch. That going out to Todd would be a good idea right now.

He ignored the hunch, telling it that listening to Todd would be much better, not ruining whatever Todd was doing now would be better.

“Love world of love, world of love,  
Love world of love, whoa-whoa  
Love world of love, world of love,  
Love world of la-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-hove  
A world, world of love, a world of love  
“Well his eyes, sparkle like butterflies  
Floating up into the sky, they make me say oh my.”

Dirk could see Todd setting the whisk back into the bowl with batter and going to the sink to clean off his hand.

Todd sighed sadly, and the hunch that Dirk had faded away with a twinge of annoyance from the universe.

Dirk guiltily snuck back into his room to wait until Todd called on him to eat breakfast, so that he might not realize that Dirk had been spying on him.

In the meantime, he searched for the song, hoping to listen to it again. Typing ‘Love world of love’ into the search bar brought up a video quickly.

It was only a few seconds before the intro turned into lyrics:

“Well her eyes sparkle like butterflies  
Floating up into the sky, they make me say oh my”

Dirk slowly reached out and rewound the video to listen to the first part again.

“Well her eyes sparkle like butterflies-  
“Well her eyes sp-  
“-ell her ey-  
“her”

Todd had definitely said ‘his’.

But Todd wasn’t gay, at least, he’d never thought Todd was gay. And Dirk prided himself as having an excellent sense for these kinds of things.

Even if Todd were gay, who would he be singing about?

Dirk didn’t let himself hope that it might be him, brushing the logic that that might be him off as foolish hopefulness brought about because of his stupid crush. It really was a stupid crush, Dirk felt completely foolish, he’d known Todd for less than a month, and already he was smitten. But with Todd, Dirk felt like it was inevitable from the start. The way that Dirk felt for Todd was entirely ineffable, but it was something like lighting setting his heart on fire every time they made eye contact, like he could feel exactly how small he was in the universe every time Todd smiled at him, like torture, plain and simple, when Dirk realized that he had very little chance with someone like Todd.

He died a little every time Todd put himself down, saying that he was an inherently shitty person, or that he deserved every bad thing coming to him. ‘After all,’ Todd had told him once, while getting sloppy drunk off cheap beer, ‘You’re the one that keeps telling me that the universe will re-pay me for what I do. I just do a lot of really shitty things, and guess what? The universe is giving me exactly what I deserve.’

That had absolutely broken Dirk’s heart. Todd had left before Dirk had been able to sternly tell him that he wasn’t the bad person that Todd thought himself to be.

A loud knock on Dirk’s door shook him out of his reverie.

“Hey, it’s nearly ten, get your ass out of bed, I made pancakes.” Todd seemed cheerful, even after the sad expression Dirk had caught on his face before sneaking off back to his room.

Dirk closed his laptop, making sure to close out of the ‘Love World of Love’ tab before doing so.

He opened the door and beamed down at Todd. “That’s excellent assistant-ing of you!”

Todd got an amused gleam to his eyes, “I thought I’d been promoted from assistant to ‘ward’.”

Dirk faltered. He had done that. “Well, it’s excellent… Ward-ing? I’ll have to think about that one.”

“How about I’m just doing it as a friend and not as a co-worker?” Todd offered as he led Dirk into the tiny dining area, where Todd had already set the table.

Dirk stopped in his tracks, and it took Todd a few more paces to realize. “Oh.” Dirk breathed.

“Come on, let’s eat.” Todd smiled softly at him.

And just like that, just for a moment, Dirk could feel every cog of the universe moving all at once, could feel the awesome size of everything, could feel how infinitesimally tiny he truly was.

A chair scraped against tile and it was gone.

So he ate.

-+-+-+-+-

 

A week prior

Todd had only known Dirk for a few weeks, but he was hooked. He knew he could never go back to his pre-Dirk life, and he honestly didn’t want to, despite how murder-y post-Dirk life had started.

It was just a Saturday afternoon when it hit Todd. Dirk had been ‘filling out paperwork’ (or that’s what he was claiming to do, it looked to Todd more like he was making paper airplanes out of said paperwork), Todd had been texting Farah, when he’d looked up and caught Dirk’s eyes on his. His heart had caught in his chest, and he felt like he couldn’t breathe. For a moment, Todd had thought it was a pararibulitis attack, but when his heart-rate had sped up tenfold when Dirk gave him that smirk of his, and his ability to breathe had returned the moment Dirk’s eyes had slid back to the paper he was then doodling on, Todd knew.

He excused himself and sent a quick text to Farah to meet him at their regular café for an urgent matter.

His hands shook slightly as he ordered his coffee and sat at the back of the shop, waiting for Farah to arrive.

She was in total bodyguard mode when she did, and Todd supposed that was probably his fault for not explaining that it wasn’t an emergency.

“What’s wrong, where’s Dirk, is everything okay?”

“Uh, nothing really, at the office, and… yeah.”

“Then what the hell, Todd?” She slid into the seat opposite him, looking vaguely annoyed.

“I…” Todd looked down into his coffee. “I think- I was- today- what I’m trying to say is-” He sighed, and started small. “Is Dirk gay?”

Farah gave him a weird look, one of disbelief and amusement. “Yeah.” She laughed, “What, you’re just now getting that?” A pause, and she narrowed her eyes, “You don’t have a problem with that do you?”

“No! Not at all, I mean-” He backtracked. “What I’m trying to say, is that I think I may be a little bit… in love with Dirk.” He said, avoiding eye contact at all cost.

Farah stared at him for a long time before breaking out into loud laughter that brought a few nasty stares to their table.

“Farah…” Todd groaned. “Please don’t.”

“I’m sorry,” (she didn’t sound sorry) “This is what you’ve gotten all upset about?”

“Well, yeah! I think I’m fairly justified to be a little upset, I’ve just realized I’m in love with my best friend, with little to no chance that he actually reciprocates, and you tell me that I shouldn’t be upset about it?”

Farah snorted into her coffee. “You think-?” She grinned and laughed a little cruelly. “You think there’s ‘little to no chance’ that Dirk like you back?”

“Well, yeah? I mean, have you seen any evidence to the contrary?”

“Uh… yeah.” She said, as if it were obvious. “I mean, the evidence is all there, Todd. He looks at you like you hang the stars every night, and he’s literally the gayest man I’ve ever laid eyes on.”

“He’s told you that he’s gay?” Todd asked, a little hurt that he hadn’t told him.

“No? But it radiates off of him like some sort of pheromone he lets off to attract other gay people.”

“That’s just making assumptions, Farah.” Todd crossed his arms, “Do I look gay to you?”

“No. You look pretty fucking bi though.” Farah said, a little smirk playing across her face.

“What? How could you possibly get that?” 

“Are you offended that you look bi, Todd? Because if you’re trying to look straight, you’re failing miserably. I mean, no one who wears plaid is actually straight, unless they’re a literal cowboy. But, much more importantly, Dirk is definitely gay. Have you bothered to ever actually look at him? Look at the jackets he wears, look at his shoes, his hair? That boy is gay, Todd. Do you need me to ask him?” She waved her phone, as if to say she was ready to call him immediately. 

“Please don’t.” Todd responded, however much he’d like confirmation that Dirk was indeed gay. “But even if he is gay, that doesn’t mean that he likes me.”

“Have you-” Farah threw her hands in the air in frustration, “You know what? If you’re going to be an idiot about it, I'm not going to help you.”

“I'm not being an idiot, Farah. I'm just saying he’s not necessarily in love with me.”

The phone Farah had been waving around just a minute ago rang in her hands. Dirk, the caller ID told them. 

“Hey Dirk, I'm with Todd, you're on speaker.”

“Oh! Hello, Todd.”

“Hey, Dirk.” Todd glared at Farah, who just shrugged innocently. 

“Okay,” Farah said, now getting an evil grin on her face. 

Todd’s eyes widened comically in fear.

“Dirk, Todd and I have a difference of opinion here. I said you're obviously gay, Todd isn't so sure.”

Dirk scoffed. “Come on Todd, that's just offensive. I pride myself with always being the most overtly gay man in the room. Look at what I wear, for god’s sake. Straight men don't wear bright yellow jackets, Todd.” Todd could hear the look of disdain on Dirk’s face. 

With one last glare at Farah, Todd sighed. “Okay Dirk, I see your point, sorry for trying to not be a presumptuous asshole.”

Dirk rolled his eyes, Todd just knew he did. 

“Todd, thinking I'm straight…” Dirk mumbled, and he hung up the phone. 

Farah paused. “How long you want to bet it takes before he realizes that he didn't talk about what he called for in the first place?”

“At least ten minutes.”

 

-+-+-+-+-

The Present

Dirk couldn’t figure Todd out. First he thought that Dirk was straight, then it turned out that Todd himself wasn’t entirely straight. Dirk had just figured Todd was straight when he’d heard that Todd hadn’t figured out that Dirk was gay. Usually only straight people assumed that.

He knew what Farah would tell him, were he to explain to her about his predicament. ‘Dirk you’re an idiot’ She would say, ‘Just fucking tell him’ She would say, ‘I’m sure he feels the same way’ She would say.

How could she be so certain, though? Dirk had only just figured out that Todd was anything but straight, and he hadn’t had any time to gather information on how Todd might feel about him.

So he watched as Todd ate his pancakes.

“Todd,” He said, foolish enough to open his mouth.

“Mm?” Todd said around his bite of pancake. His eyes, full of questions as if Todd himself was also thinking about too many things all at once, flicked up to look into Dirk’s own eyes.

“A week or so ago, you were with Farah, and I called her to ask about something financial or another, what exactly doesn’t matter in the slightest, but she told me that you, erm,” Dirk thought for a moment on how to continue. He could see the panic of understanding come over Todd’s face.

“She said that you didn’t think that I was gay, and I mean… I just kind of wanted, I mean, wanted to know how the subject came up. Why would it matter to you?”

Todd swallowed the mouthful of pancake and didn’t quite look Dirk in the eye when he answered. “I’m not homophobic or anything. I mean, I think- rather, I know, I’m pretty sure…” Todd put down his fork and sighed. “What I’m trying to say is that I’m bi myself, Dirk. I was just… telling that to Farah. She made a comment about you being gay, I just didn’t quite believe her because- yeah.” Dirk saw Todd grind his teeth- whether it was in frustration, or pain, or something else, Dirk wasn’t sure.

Something Todd had said caused a flash of pain in Dirk’s chest. “Why… Why didn’t you tell me? That you’re bi. It’s just… Surely you know I wouldn’t react badly.”

 

Todd’s eyes widened, realizing his mistake. “Dirk, it’s not that I didn’t want to tell you, or that I didn’t trust you, it’s just… It’s hard. Farah was the first person I’ve come out to. I mean, I could never tell any of my bandmates, they’d have all stopped talking to me, and Amanda… I wanted to tell her, but every time I tried… It would just get caught in my throat, I’d panic, and I wouldn’t know what to do. Dirk, it’s not that I’m uncomfortable with my sexuality, but not all of us are quite as… open as you are. I just don’t advertise it. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, I just didn’t know how.” Todd was telling the truth, but something on his face said there was something he wasn’t saying. 

Dirk sighed, and smiled at Todd. “Well I’m glad you told me now.” He was glad for Todd to tell him directly. To get confirmation. To know that Todd trusted him enough to come out to him, even though Todd hadn’t even come out to his own sister yet. 

“I did wonder.” Dirk mused.

Todd rolled his eyes, “Is it really that obvious? You know, just because a person wears plaid doesn’t automatically make them queer.”

“Well, for one- it really usually does, and for another, I mean, the singing, Todd.” Dirk said with a second nudge from the universe in the same day. 

Todd froze. “The… singing.”

“Well I was walking out to get food this morning, because I smelled the pancakes cooking, and then I heard you singing, and, well, I didn’t want to rudely interrupt, you seemed like you were having a moment, so I was listening, and when I didn’t recognize the song, I went back into my room and played it, except that in the song on YouTube, they use female pronouns, whereas you were using male ones and so I just kind of assumed that you were doing that consciously, and from there it wasn’t a hard jump to make. Now the real question,” Dirk said, smirking at Todd, “Is, if you’re bi then why change the pronouns, unless you’ve got your eye on someone specific.”

Todd looked like he wanted to crawl into his own skin.

“Now, I don’t know this for certain, Todd, but seeing as you have a very limited repertoire of men you know, it shouldn’t be too hard to narrow down it down to the person it is.”

Todd’s breathing quickened, as flashes of conversations flicked through his mind, as if his brain was trying to find a specific TV channel, until it landed on:

“I mean, the evidence is all there, Todd. He looks at you like you hang the stars every night, and he’s literally the gayest man I’ve ever laid eyes on.”

Todd took a deep breath and stared deeply into his pancakes. “You’re right. I do have my eye on someone specific, and you’re right that I don’t know a lot of men. Only one that I could possibly see myself liking. N- Not that I’m stupid enough to think that he’d like me back. I don’t deserve him.”

“Todd,” Dirk said gently, moving his chair to be right in front of Todd “Just because you’ve messed up in the past doesn’t mean that you don’t deserve to be loved. You realize that I’ve done a lot- a lot- of stupid, stupid things in my life, does that mean that nobody likes me?”

“It’s not the same. Like I said, I don’t expect him to like me back, so you don’t have to try this hard, Dirk.”

“Well, I should hope you like surprises then.”

Dirk’s slender fingers caught the bottom of Todd’s chin and pulled up so that Todd was forced to look at Dirk.

“Surprises?” Todd’s speech sounded distracted as he stared wide-eyed into Dirk’s own eyes.  
“Can I kiss you?”

“Kiss me?”

Dirk gave another smirk, “Well other things might happen, but kissing seems like a good place to start.”

Todd stared, brain working on overtime trying to process what was happening.

“Yes.” He finally said, “Kiss me.”

And so Dirk did.


End file.
